Brandon’s Island

It’s rumored that Joe Biden shit his pants at the Vatican last October. The word around Rome was much more polite, calling it a ‘bathroom accident’. The live feed from the Vatican was bizarrely cut off when circumstances required that the holy janitors tend to the latest American President’s mess on the world stage.

Foreign visits to The Holy See of American delegations that include the commander-in-chief are now described using phraseology typically reserved for events concerning toddlers at preschools.

Awe, did Bwandon have anuva bafwoom accident?

As with every mishap in his life he gets a pass. Partly due to his decrepit elder condition, partly due to his status as the selected puppet of global management. No President has ever skated by with so many catastrophic blunders unscathed, unquestioned, unacknowledged, or in the case of his crackhead son’s laptop of sexual deviance, corruption, and treasonous treasures that tie in the President himself, so thoroughly ignored altogether as if like Marty McFly’s future family in that 1955 photograph, the laptop story wasn’t just spiked by the establishment, it was, “Erased. Erased from existence.”

The latest news on that laptop. (March 29, 2022)

They said the last guy was made of Teflon because he could run his mouth and maneuver against his political opponents willy-nilly while deflecting the media’s bullets as Wonder Woman does with her magic wrist bracelets.

Teflon Don. The Don made of Teflon.

The media called everything out of his mouth a gaffe. Every breath, every step, strut, look, utterance was constantly scrutinized as if the fate of all mankind were at stake. This was not ‘journalism’ but endless attempts to collude with the shadow state to manufacture controversy and gaffes to undermine a Presidency. It all backfired, destroying the Corporate media’s credibility with anyone capable of rubbing two functioning brain cells together. Gaffes are so 20th century anyway.

In a post-propaganda reality TV TikTok policy-influencer ad-hoc corporatocracy nothing can ever be a gaffe. Gaffes are reserved for politicians in upstanding republics or representative democracies where common decency is still valued by the polity. We are long past the days of politicos being held accountable for anything. When corruption, double-dealing, self-enriching are the foundations of public service then all those little gaffes become meaningless, if not quaint pop culture Twitter water cooler conversations.

The media have always been tools of the neoliberal order. They serve the corporate candidates regardless of their party but have a special affinity for taking four or eight-year holidays when a democrat is elected. So when word of pedophiliac images on the President’s crack head son’s laptop leaks out they’re happy to ignore it. When the old man can’t control his bodily functions, nobody will report on it. No story is ever of any significant public importance that it can’t be ignored for the benefit of the Corporate-State.

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